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I'trêm breit vulaçozão ye spalla eiátlin nelöffnes pieqi aummit su berwegr'ra'ao.

The Quest of the Dooty Nadog*

Saturday, Jan. 17, 2004 -
Apóslâmin ida corbalanyrtne 'lsão rohl'daathiém vá nença iroyssÿrd.

You are respectfully invited to become a member of the Diaryland Order Of The Yellow Nights And Days Of Georg, affectionally and acronymically known as the Dooty Nadog.

Has your guestbook been visited by the omnipresent entity which calls itself georg? Have you been a recipient of "greetz", allegedly from Vienna, Austria? Is "your site" "really fantastic" or "really great" or does it "rock"?

If you can answer yes to one or all of these questions, you have fulfilled the first requisite for membership in the Dooty Nadog. To gain admittance to the Order, honor requires that you answer georg at least once, but the more notes you leave in georg's guestbook, the more honor you will accrue as a k'nigget of the Dooty Nadog. Your entries in georg's guestbook should be creative, irreverent, ironic, absurd, and perhaps even deranged, although these qualities are not absolute requisites for membership in the Order. However, above all else, your messages to georg should be polite and must always include the word "yellow" or a synonym for yellow, such as saffron, lemon, gold, canary, sunny, sallow, straw, lutescent, tawny, aureate, etc.. Or you can invoke banana references, make allusions to Van Gogh's sunflowers, or mention the fat ass side of a school bus. (But only if the customs of your native land, like the US of A, require school buses to be painted bright yellow.) Henceforth, these messages, these notes, these billet-doux, shall be known as the Yellow Missives.

Whenever you bestow a Yellow Missive upon georg, leave a note for me in my guestbook so that I may inscribe your deathless name in The Dooty Nadog Book of Honor. Once you have made your first Yellow Missive, you may join the Dooty Nadog diary ring and put this Mark of Honor and Fealty upon your diary:

< Z @ D >

Thus the sacred html:


If you would rather not join another freakin' diary ring, you can still place the Matthew of Honor and Fealty (Mark's twin brother) upon your diary:

Thus the sacred html:

For those unfortunate few who have not yet received a benediction from georg in your guestbook, you can choose to wait until georg inevitably descends upon you. Or you can achieve immediate immortal membership in the Dooty Nadog by writing an entreaty in georg's guestbook. You must ask, or even beg, for "greetz" and you must use the word "yellow" or a fulgent equivalent (see above) in your message. Do not fret if georg grants not your boon nor fills your guestbook with "greetz". You will have satisfied your membership "dooties" by posting a Yellow Missive in georg's guestbook and therefore will be eligible for full investiture as a k'nigget of the Diaryland Order Of The Yellow Nights And Days Of Georg.

As you can see, no one has been inscribed yet. I guess I could inscribe myself. . .

And I'm pretty sure Peth deserves to be here. . .


Addendum: Anyone sprechen sie Deutsch? Should I worry about what dooty nadog might mean in German? Should I worry what it means in English?

Addendum #2: Sir Emily of the Pharmacopoeial Orb, aka Mnvnjnsn, has become a charter member of the Dooty Nadog with this rollicking ditty: Roses are red, tulips are yellow, you must read a lot, you ubiquitous fellow. Which inspired me to this morning's foray: Hallo, georg! Just stopped by to gaze once again at the implacably xanthic dandelion facade of the most famously yellow non-personage I have not ever met. Mine's not very witty, but at least it's redundant.

Addendum #3:

< Z @ D >

Thus the sacred html:

Thus the sacred html:

Addendum #4: Her Serene Highness boasts of a seven-month relationship with georg. Should I be jealous, czarina?

Addendum Ad Infinitum:

Sir Peth of the Orange Pethumbra (who, if I'm not mistaken, was the instigator of the First Crusades to the Yellow Land):
Hi Georg! You love my site almost as much as I love whippings! 'Zaziel told me to visit you and Zanti told me to buy music from you, but I have enough Nina Hagen already, thank you very 99 balloons much! Have a yeller day!

Sir Wit of Kit
What excitement you caused, back in late December, when I saw my sadly neglected, even yellowing Diaryland guestbook tagged by someone in Europe...Wow Europe. I Mike Meyer's Saturday Night Live Yenta mom would say...butter. Thanks for noticing me. Take care.

 The Yellow Running Dog Star - awarded to the Brave K'nigget who has Thrice Endured greetz from the Stygian shores of darkest Vienna Sir Dave of the Discotheque (the inspiration behind the Dooty Nadog's Sunflower-on-a-Gules-Field Standard, just as Queen Trixie was the inspiration for the Rubber Sheldrake Escutcheon):
Well strike me purple (or green, or yellow or whatever) I was surprised to get a message from Austria, but thank-you for your unsolicited, yet sincere, greetz. Dxx

I thought we needed to include a choice for whomever would like to bear a more brawny insignia upon their shield:

< Z @ D >

Thus the sacred html:

Thus the sacred html:

Queen Trixie's Song of Georg
Georg of the saffrow hue,
virtual traveler delivering greetings due.
Incandescently golden, Auriferous blonde...
perpetually sunny with our guestbooks you bond.
Greetz from Vienna is your battle cry,
some may view you with a jaundiced eye.
But there are those who adore your honeyed prose.
With flaxen persistance your stature arose.
So we flock to return your greetz and find,
a canary page flavored like lemon rind.
So we salute you Georg, we proud, we few,
we marvel at your color scheme, your yellow, yellow, hue.

Sir Jerrbear the Munificent
Your webpage is very yellow. Beautimous! Dooty Nadog rules! Et cetera! Peter Cetera!

Sir Auguste Du Rêve
I am filled with yellow joy! Thanks for the greetings at my site.

 The Buff Cockade, aka the Badge of the Bonepated Picador, awarded to any k'nigget who has the Temerity to post three (or more) Yellow Missives to the Miscreant Guestbook of Georg 'Zaziel, King of the Gay Vagabond Ghouls
Georg! You haven't written me in ages! Absolute ages and ages of yellow pages. Where are your earnest conjurations and greetz from Vienna? I thought you were my faithful ochroid trilobite. Where has gone the love between us like the banana palm did flourish, and like a stiff wheaten garland stood a golden comma 'tween our amities?

< Z @ D >

Thus the sacred html:

Thus the sacred html:

Sir Quiconque
I usually view random tags with a jaundiced eye, but your greetz made me smile inside. I had been thinking of abandoning the entire blog experience, but with your encouragement, I hope to stay creative forever. Thank you, Georg. You've changed my life. And now I know where to purchase German pop music online. What a bonus!

Sir Sooner, the Benrik Berserker and Lord of the Soonerverse
Oh, G. May I call you G? Oh, G. First off, Greetz from New Jersey, USA. Second, let's get something straight. I will try to stay creative, G. I will. But I need something in exchange. Please send me a sallow haired house boy in his twenties from the Austrian mountains who will do the cleaning up around my place and will require regular sex with me and the occasional meal as his only payment. I find that cleaning up after my own filthy ass and the extensive efforts I make to bed canary-haired Austrians drain my creative energies and take time away from my freaky creative endeavors. It's a social contract, G. You take care of my needs and I'll stay creative just for you. Third, this is an awesome site and it's great to be here.

 The Golden Palm of Patience - awarded to the Long-Suffering Aspirant who has Persevered thru Our Long Winter of Neglectfulness Sir Bevin the Forbearant
My Dearest Georg: I don't know if you ever shop on ebay, but I've been doing a lot of shopping recently. I have been desperate, DESPERATE to find one half skein saffron eyelash yarn. If you have time to look, would you mind just searching a bit. Also, have you heard the new ani difranco album? Should I run out and get it right now or what? Love and kisses, Bevin

Sir Candoor, the Master of Minimalism, the Sage of Simplicity
You have a very yellow site.


If your browser is capable of recognizing one of the many fonts known as "Old English", it should make this entry ever so much more entertaining.


* Oh, gawd, I know it's not a real entry but I just had to get this bizarre idea out of my system.

Apóslâmin ida corbalanç 'lse nesgla ugaró-cham sa cru ogrulho batãoltha alémvásde.

last eleven:

Resurrection - Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Arts and Letters -
Friday, June 17, 2005
Domestic Obsessions -
Tuesday, April 5, 2005
The Kindness of Strangers -
Tuesday, April 5, 2005
Gone -
Saturday, April 2, 2005
Coming Back, Little By Little -
Saturday, April 2, 2005
Effing Around -
Thursday, March 31, 2005
Explicably Yours -
Wednesday, February 9, 2005
Things Too Innumerable To Mention -
Sunday, January 30, 2005
Mr. Armstrong -
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
The Pope in Our Kitchen -
Saturday, October 2, 2004

<- Z @ D ->

Sa r'jião ossível meninonceiv êo poshik mä'änch uscantebatahla oÿr musiu oÿr muiko.
Copyright © 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005 by gcs

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